The Semmes Golfing Accident

ya'll

Joe, from Semmes Alabama and a notoriously bad golfer, hits his ball off the first tee and watches as it slices to the right and disappears through an open window. Figuring that’s the end of it, he gets another ball out of his bag and plays on. On the eighth hole, a Mobile County Sheriff’s Deputy walks up to Joe on the course and says, “Did you hit a golf ball through a window back there?” Joe says, “Yes I did.” “Well,” says the deputy, “it knocked a lamp over, scaring the dog, which raced out of the house onto Schillinger Road. Continue Reading →

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Perseids Meteor Shower

Perseids Meteor Shower

Don’t forget that the Perseids meteor shower peaks August 12 to 13. If we have clear skys, this year will be one of the best for viewing the meteors since the moon will be in new Moon – almost dark. The meteors should be visible everywhere in the sky but it is best for you to view the darkest part of the sky between midnight and dawn. Continue Reading →

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SALES TAX HOLIDAY

Semmes AL Tax-Free-Shopping

The City of Semmes is participating in the tenth annual Alabama Sales Tax Holiday. Beginning
Friday, August 7th, 2015 @ 12:01 AM
and ending
Sunday, August 9th, 2015 @ 12 midnight

Giving shoppers the opportunity to purchase certain school supplies, computers and clothing free of State and City sales tax. CLOTHING
$100 or less per article of clothing
EXEMPT
Includes all human wearing apparel suitable for general use – Not al all-inclusive list

belts
boots
caps
coats
diapers
dresses
gloves
gym suits
hats
hosiery
jackets
jeans
neckties
pajamas
pants
raincoats
roes
sandals
scarves
school uniforms
shirts
shoes
shorts
socks
sneakers
underwear
Continue Reading →

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Semmes Pastor Offers No Comfort

Semmes Pastor Offers No Comfort

Semmes Pastor Offers No Comfort

A young member of a Semmes AL church visited his pastor and asked for some guidance. “What’s wrong – How can I help?” asked the pastor of the young, well-dressed church member who sat staring grimly out the window. “Two months ago my grandfather died and left me one- hundred thousand dollars” said the man. “That doesn’t sound like anything to be upset about,” said the pastor. “It sounds very much like your grandfather loved you. Continue Reading →

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Semmes Guy To Be Rich

Semmes AL Guy To Be Rich

Joe, from Semmes AL, was a single guy living at home with his father and working in the family business. When he found out he was going to inherit a fortune when his sick father died, he decided he needed a wife with whom to share his fortune. One evening at an investment seminar he spotted the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. Her beauty took his breath away. “I may look like just an ordinary man,” he said to her, “but in just a few years, my father will pass, and I’ll inherit his large fortune.”

Impressed, the woman took his business card and three months later, she became Joe’s stepmother. Continue Reading →

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How To Get Really Smart

Semmes Fish Market

How To Get Really Smart
A customer at Semmes Stingray Seafood Emporium marvelled at the owner’s quick wit and intelligence. ‘Tell me, Simon, what makes you so smart?’ ‘I wouldn’t share my secret with just anyone, ‘Simon replies, lowering his voice so the other shoppers won’t hear.’ But since you’re a good and faithful customer, I’ll let you in on it. Fish heads. Continue Reading →

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Oh, Midnight by Joshua Fletcher

Born in Macon, Georgia, Joshua Fletcher was raised just south of Atlanta in the suburbs of Fayette County. His first foray into songwriting came in the form of aggressive two minute long punk tunes penned for his then band, The Knockout. Like many in the genre, he grew accustomed to writing lyrics from the perspective of the underdog. “It’s pretty hard to be punk in the suburbs, so obviously I couldn’t write about ‘typical’ punk things. I stuck to the ‘youth as the underdog’ kind of theme. Continue Reading →

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